restarted - DD and Dixie training - Page 9 - The Horse Forum
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post #81 of 86 Old 05-26-2014, 03:43 PM Thread Starter
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Join Date: Aug 2013
Location: Central MS
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Foxtail Ranch View Post
What brings you to PDX? I live 4 hrs away, used to live there, and know the city well. I will be up there next weekend for niece's graduation.

You have my support and respect. Raising teens is really tough stuff.

Sounds like Dixie and you are making great strides! Must feel really good to see her develop. Nice work!
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i work for army corps of engineers --- and we have 2 datacenters --- so our team is split across the 2 --- once a year we have a week long get-together/meeting to discuss what we have done and where we are going with our different projects

i get there 1 june and leave 6 june

teens are a nightmare :p --- but i love her to death -- i love a good challenge --- working horses and teens seem to be on the same level of difficulty --- but horses don't roll their eyes are call you names :p

i have seen how far Dixie can backslide when i don't keep up with her .... i wonder if teens are the same?
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post #82 of 86 Old 05-26-2014, 03:47 PM Thread Starter
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Originally Posted by EquineBovine View Post
You know what set me straight as a kid? When my mum would cry and my dad would tell me how disappointed he was in me. Boy did that make me rethink my self in titled lil teenager attitude haha those lectures do work but so does the hard work. You're doing a great job. Hats of to you sir.
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neither me or my wife are cryers --- we did tell her we are disappointed

told her we are tired and worn out and she is making the entire family miserable --- me and her mom will always be on the same team -- she can either join our team and we can be happy, or she can be our enemy and we can all be miserable --- it is completely up to her

also made sure she understood that it makes us sad that we can't let her go do the things she wants --- it would be like a judge telling a theif or vandal "yeah, you are guilty, but i am just going to let you go without any punishment" ect... it just isn't right
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post #83 of 86 Old 05-26-2014, 06:38 PM
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Join Date: Mar 2012
Location: Oregon, USA
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I will be in PDX for niece's graduation June 1!

I thought I would share some stuff from Love & Logic that I liked the most.

One Liners

By Jim Fay
Kids seem to have a repertoire of "hooks" they use to get their parents to argue with them. Here are some Love and Logic One-Liners that will get parents off the hook and cause children to do more of the thinking.

Remember: The "one-liners" are only effective when said with genuine compassion and understanding. These are never intended to be flippant remarks that discount the feelings of the child. If an adult uses these responses to try to get the better of a child, the problem will only become worse. The adult's own attitude at these times is crucial to success.

"Probably so."
"I know."
"Nice try."
"I bet it feels that way."
"What do you think you're going to do."
"I don't know. What do you think?"
"Bummer. How sad."
"Thanks for sharing that."
"Don't worry about it now."
"That's an option."
"I bet that's true."
"Maybe you'll like what we have for the next meal better."
"What do you think I think about that?"
"I'm not sure how to react to that. I'll have to get back to you on it."
"I'll let you know what will work for me."
"I'll love you wherever you live."


This idea really helped when me when my kids told me they hated me, I was mean, and that kind of fun stuff. Joe was especially great at getting and keeping the argument going, so I would just use these when I wanted to shut down the argument.
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post #84 of 86 Old 05-27-2014, 09:37 AM Thread Starter
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Foxtail Ranch View Post
I will be in PDX for niece's graduation June 1!
congrats to your niece :)
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post #85 of 86 Old 06-17-2014, 09:41 PM Thread Starter
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Join Date: Aug 2013
Location: Central MS
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day 13

we just rode today -- nothing serious -- just riding back and forth
DD wanted to race across the pasture -- so we opened the throttle a little bit
she came close to a gallop, i got up to a nice lope

spent about an hour and a half with the horses -- we talked -- she feels like we are overly critical of her -- i explained that we are only critical when she has a bad attitude -- if she had a good attitude we would let a lot of stuff slide

glad we finally had time to do this again
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post #86 of 86 Old 06-22-2014, 08:15 AM Thread Starter
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Day 14 --- was actually Friday the 20th -- been busy

DD wanted to ride Dixie -- since she is coming along well enough in her riding and is showing a lot more confidence i let her

Left me with a choice between Gwen and Whiskey so i decided to get this months ride on Whiseky

DD did a lot of trotting -- she is getting really good -- before she would freak out and throw on the breaks after a few strides --- this time she was trotting all the way across the pasture

i got on Whiskey and worked on going forward, and she did pretty good.
walked out to the middle of a pasture, got off and sat down in a chair, Whiskey stomped at me, so i backed her up hard and then sat back down to watch DD

when done, i got back on her and we walked back to the front yard.

we might have done about 45 minutes riding before we got a torrential downpour
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