Why are So Many Horse People...Jerks? - Page 2 - The Horse Forum
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post #11 of 74 Old 01-09-2017, 09:45 PM
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The Youtube comments section is particularly nasty. I don't know what it is, but people use that space to say the most toxic things that come to mind. I don't know why this is a thing. If you don't want these comments, disable them on the video or make it private.

*Some* horse people are exactly as you describe them. In fact there is a rather popular horse youtube channel where the owner basically rants and blasts people in 98% of his very long videos. Sometimes he has a point, most of the time he is just yelling in a long video. There is a guitar channel owned by a professional session guitarist that is almost exactly the same as far as the yelling trolling long videos calling everyone idiots.

Maybe it isn't really that *horse people* are elitist jerks that are going to find fault with everything you do, but some of those people are into horses.

You are going to get some of that in any hobby, especially one that involves so many parts and so much knowledge. For example a lot of guitar nerds think the only music worth learning is the Blues, anything else is just garbage and banging on a guitar. That should sound familiar to anyone who has done anything with horses. I think it is more about how some people act about hobbies they spend a lot of money and time on and are passionate about.

Here is the thing though. In this industry you have to keep in mind that if you stay in horses long enough, and do much with them you'll see those people again and again. I have a trainer in my past I don't think much of. I don't say a word about them to anyone because they are basically fine, and I gain nothing by talking smack. The best thing for me to do is be a little better every time I run into them and let my riding and my horsemanship do the talking for me.

There are also some really great, knowledgable and humble people in horses. Those folks usually have something to say that is actually worth listening to.
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post #12 of 74 Old 01-09-2017, 09:46 PM
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Don't let them get to you. Those who can do, those that can't teach. I know in my profession the less capable are always trying to cut down the capable. The best teacher about a horse is a horse. The only teacher in my opinion. Spend time with them and they will teach you how to listen to them. Unless I ask for help with my horse DO NOT HELP ME WITH MY HORSE. Sometimes we have to make this clear with people.
I used to have this ugly little paint. Hurt your eyes just to look at him. I got him for free when he was 5. Never been ridden and barely halter broke. He turned out to be one of the best horses I've ever owned. People always looked down their nose at him. Short, not quite 15 hands and looked like he was put together from used parts.
Until we rode. The little guy had heart. He could prance, sidestep, Anything I asked from him. He had a walk that put walkers to shame and he was TOUGH. Great with cows too. Wherever we went I just let him go. He went off to eat and came back every time. That upset a lot of people. If they let go of their horse, it was gone. I tell them it's because their horse doesn't like them. They don't listen to the owner of an ugly little paint.
About a year ago the elk came through and knocked down the west fence during the night. All the horses got out (about 20) and ran down the road. He got killed. Nobody else got hurt.
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post #13 of 74 Old 01-09-2017, 09:53 PM
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I've searched long and hard for horsey friends in my area, without much luck.

From the experiences I've had, I've gathered that most of the "jerks" problems were that they were very opinionated and stuck in their own ways. Like "my way or the highway."

Everyone I've tried to befriend thought that their way was the right way, and the only way. The BIGGEST thing I've learned in my years with horses is that there are thousands of ways to do one thing, and many or most of them are right. There is no one right way.

Most of the jerks I've encountered looked at my way of doing something, saw that it wasn't their way, and automatically passed judgement that I didn't know anything because I didn't know their way. With the people I tried to befriend, it would start small, like little snide comments about my horses habits, or comments about the way I was working with him.

The total full out jerks I completely ignore. If they want to say stuff like that to a stranger they don't deserve your time. I'd so much rather politely try to help someone than put them down.
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post #14 of 74 Old 01-09-2017, 09:56 PM
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elk dog, your "ugly little paint" got killed? That's so sad and I'm very sorry for your loss
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post #15 of 74 Old 01-09-2017, 10:09 PM
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In this day and age of declining interest in horse showing, equestrian activities, ownership, horse zoned properties, these people who discourage and insult fellow equestrians will be very sorry. If all of us who want to see the horse industry continue and flourish, well we better start promoting everything "horsey" and encourage all newbies, fellow riders, exhibitors, trail riders, etc. Otherwise it will be gone to us.

I am not here to promote anythingNo, that's not true, I am here to promote everything equestrian and everyone enjoying horses!
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post #16 of 74 Old 01-09-2017, 10:52 PM
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Originally Posted by Blue View Post
elk dog, your "ugly little paint" got killed? That's so sad and I'm very sorry for your loss
Thank you:
Elk Dog 2006-2016 R.I.P.
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post #17 of 74 Old 01-09-2017, 11:45 PM
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Originally Posted by waresbear View Post
In this day and age of declining interest in horse showing, equestrian activities, ownership, horse zoned properties, these people who discourage and insult fellow equestrians will be very sorry. If all of us who want to see the horse industry continue and flourish, well we better start promoting everything "horsey" and encourage all newbies, fellow riders, exhibitors, trail riders, etc. Otherwise it will be gone to us.
Waresbare I don't just like your post I love it!

It's a fact of life that you're going to deal with people like this in all walks of life. I have to say though that I don't see it near as much in real life as I do on the internet. Maybe because we can see more of their body language in person that the words don't seem as rude.

Partly, I think due to the fact that we get used communicating with our horses in clear precise language so carry it over to human interaction and that being as blunt to a human can be little more hurtful. Then again there are people who wear their feelings on their sleeves and get them hurt when there was no meanness intended by the other person.

And lastly, some people yell and come across as rude when they see someone doing something dangerous and they are scared for that person or horse. Picture a mom who yanks her kid off of something they shouldn't be climbing on and either yells or gives them a whack on the behind, is this mom being rude or is she being protective? I ride with a lady that had a whole herd of her own kids and just kinda treated any young person or newbie like her own and she YELLED if you did something she didn't like. She didn't mean to be nasty she was just scared for you and that was her reaction to being scared.

R.I.P. JC 5/19/85 - 12/9/14. You made my life better.
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post #18 of 74 Old 01-09-2017, 11:49 PM
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Unfortunately there are real @ss holes everywhere. Lots of people are judgmental and rude and for whatever reason get some kind of pleasure of belittling or putting others down. I've never understood it. I was always the "odd" one, still am and always will be but in general in the horse world, what I've found is those who know the least are often the most critical and least constructive. People who know a lot and are more experienced tend to be less critical and more constructive. But I will say there are a lot of very passionate and opinionated horse people, I think that's fairly common.

I wouldn't say there are necessarily more in the horse world, I think it really depends on where you are and who you associate with. But I'll say most good horsemen and women are very humble. If you work with horses long enough, I honestly don't think there is much room for a big ego. An ego only gets in the way of good riding and good horsemanship, it's all about communication and what's best for the horse. There are many ways to do things correctly and well and many way to do it wrong. I'll just say the my way or the highway attitude is a sure way to fail in being a good rider and horseman. In my experience, there are a lot of horses who are more than happy to work for a rider who listens and respect them but if a rider gets on and has a "make them" or break them attitude and they'll get hurt or create a hostility and defensiveness in a horse who isnt naturally hostile or defensive.

I'll also say that those who "cant" aren't usually very good teachers but are really good at criticizing and belittling others. It's really easy to put people down and "assess" when you're not out there doing it or working for something. It's so easy for the mind to think how something should be or what "should" be done but in practice it doesn't work or isnt the right way.
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post #19 of 74 Old 01-10-2017, 12:27 AM
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I don't think those who "can't, teach". It's more like, "those who can't, criticize".

Short horse lover
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post #20 of 74 Old 01-10-2017, 02:31 AM Thread Starter
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Originally Posted by Blue View Post
There are jerks and mean people in any way of life. Dirt bikers, mountain bikers, ball players, poker players, even nerdy types! Learning and loving to learn is important in life. Yes, I saw a myriad of things in your video I'd be concerned about, however, the joy comfort in your video was obvious. And that horse looks like one in a million that you could learn with. Disregard the rude people and learn and enjoy.

I didn't see your video several months ago, so let me ask now. Are you getting instruction? Are you loving the horse life?

The instruction I have received has come in the form of a few ground sessions with a natural horsemanship instructor, some discussion with my girl's riding instructor (She is a natural horsemanship trainer), probably over a hundred hours of research and reading, and enough Saturdays hanging out with Patio and about 30 of his barn buddies to put me in permanent hot water with the misses.

I have a full time travel job and enough money for my kids to sometimes get riding lessons. Not enough time or money left over for me. I don't mind though. I much prefer working with horses on the ground at this stage. For me, all I care about is making the connection. That's the medicine I need.
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