Funny, I've always found love an interesting area. Real love for me is based on trust and respect with a mutual sense of enjoyment, protectiveness and affection thrown in. A strong equine partnership has all these things, as does a strong friendship and a good marriage. So if that's love then yes, I think you can love and be loved by your horse - but it's a tricky term because so many people don't seem to have a clue as to what constitutes love between humans. Parents spoil their children rather than give them the firm, fair leadership and protective love they need; people throw the word 'love' around when meaning anything from attraction to emotional dependency (or both if its Twilight! :mrgreen. So when people go 'but I want my horse to love me!' they often don't know what love is in the first place.
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I always felt horses liked us because we feed them, take care of them, etc., etc. Felt this way for decades, never thought a horse could feel love. However, one of my horses is making me think otherwise. He has attacked a deer to protect me, that was gallant and looked so gallant when he did that. But one single action made me change my mind about his capacity to show love or "love me". Last year I went down to the pasture to let the horses up to the paddocks, he & his dad (my other horse), go trotting by to get their goodies in the paddock, all of a sudden, Indy stops and looks back at me with such a look of love in his expression. He waits for me to walk up the hill a bit towards him and he reached out with his long neck & pulled me into his crook of his neck and hugged me, for no reason. Then he trots off with his old man to the food. I am convinced that horse loves me.

 

AWESOME responses and stories! My gelding put himself between me and a bear. No, I'm not kidding. It was an adolescent bear crossing our path and Khaiyaann jumped between us with his head held so high and strong. And, like you, I have seen love in his sweet, soft eyes, and have been nuzzled and hugged for no reason.
THANKS for sharing!

 

I do believe that horses can love. Not in the mooshy, gooy, you're my world way. They show their love when we need most to see it. For some, it's being relaxed and calm when we're in a bad spot, others whinny as we pull in the drive after a long, stressful day. Yes, I'm sure they love the food but a good horse appreciates what he's given. They know who is the caretaker and who is the friend. They know who will end their suffering in the end.

You can try to talk about that science hogwash, but it isn't going to change my opinion.

 

Do you mean with humans, or other horses? I think they (and most other animals) definitely feel love for other horses...just watch the way mother animals selflessly protect and nurture their babies. I don't see any reason they wouldn't feel the exact feelings us human parents feel. I also think horses feel the love of friendship between each other, with obvious bonds between some horses and dislike between others.
I wouldn't say any of my horses "love" me in the same way, I'm sure they like me ok (most of the time!). Then again, I don't "love" them the way I love other people like my kids and family.
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All animals are capable of strong emotional bonds. Where people get into trouble is anthropomorphizing that emotional response. Horses do NOT think, act, or love like humans. If you believe they do, then you're doing a grave disservice to the animal.

In order for us to truly bond with another creature, we have to understand them within the context of their instincts and how they view the world.

Love is universal, but it's not all the same, especially when we're talking about affection between different species.

 

All animals are capable of strong emotional bonds. Where people get into trouble is anthropomorphizing that emotional response. Horses do NOT think, act, or love like humans. If you believe they do, then you're doing a grave disservice to the animal.

In order for us to truly bond with another creature, we have to understand them within the context of their instincts and how they view the world.

Love is universal, but it's not all the same, especially when we're talking about affection between different species.

This.

Yes, they may feel a connection that we humans may call "love", but love comes in many different forms. There is the familial love of humans, where you would die or kill for your loved one, there is love between friends, etc. Then when you start stretching it out to other species is very similar. You couldn't compare the devoted "You are my God" love that a good dog might show to the respect and deference shown by a good and loyal horse.

So my answer to whether or not horses can love is....yes and no, it all depends on how you are defining the word. No, they don't love like humans. They don't think in a way that would cause them to form a preemptive thought "I'm going to run up to my human today because I love her so much". Theirs is more of a "you are my herd alpha, you feed me, you care for me, you scratch my itchy places, you show me that scary things really aren't that scary. You are my trusted leader and I enjoy being around you because being around you makes me feel safe" type of love.

 

Yes - I believe they do. But I don't believe it's anywhere near the level of the human understanding of it. (Heck to be honest, I don't think we understand it ourselves. When asked to define that word, you'll get a different answer from anyone you ask.) *Some* may show us on a deeper level, like waresbear's horse displayed. But as a general rule they "love" like any other species of animal. We have to be careful we don't misinterpret it to be anything other than what it is. And that will vary from horse to horse.

I know for a FACT they mourn. I've experienced that first hand and it's heart wrenching and will bring tears to my eyes thinking of that particular memory of mine. That one incident is all I needed to know that yes, they do love. Just be careful with the term

 

They certainly feel affection for some horses and some humans. When we sold Lilly in Dec 2010, Mia spent days standing at the edge of the corral where she could see the direction Lilly left. And she spent a lot of time calling softly while looking that way.

After a week, she stopped. I have no idea what would happen if she met Lilly again, but if we build a house on our empty lot, we'll find out - it is only 500 feet from Lilly's corral.

Toward humans? Affection, yes. Love? That depends on how deep the connection has to be before you call it love. When I proposed to my wife 6 weeks after our first date, I said I loved her. 26 years later, maybe I do. A lot of good times and a lot of very hard times over the last 26 years has changed what I call 'love'.

Horses have a very different way of thinking than humans do. On the whole, I think it is wrong to use words for human relations and apply it to a relationship with a horse.

I have 3 horses. The 2 geldings trust me to feed them and be fair in my treatment of them. They 'like' me, but that like would be better described as 'they are content to be around me'. The mare & I have spent a lot more time together, and have had enough 'shared misery' to bond a bit more. She will seek me out for comfort when things are bad, and acts affectionate. She sometimes sticks her head under my arm after a ride, closes her eyes and listens as I talk into her ear. When riding, we are both constantly aware of each other, in a way that is very different from any other horse I've ridden. She is by far the most human-oriented horse I've met.

But if I sold her to a good owner, would she stand at the edge of the corral and call out to me for a week? Not one chance in one thousand. We're friends, but she isn't a human and she isn't a dog and I don't think I am fair to her to apply human ideas to her actions.

 

I think horses and many other animals can and do create bonds which include affection, trust and loyalty.

What they lack is the awareness and the ability to process the meaning of that bond and invest more into it. We humans can invest more into our bond which creates love. We choose to invest more into this one, or not so much into that one, etc. Animals just go with the flow and follow pure instinct, not reason. I think these differences are what separates their bond from what we understand as love.

 

We'll never know about love, but they do learn to be very trusting, and that certainly feels and looks a lot like love.
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I think our levels of awareness are too different (not higher or lower, just different!) to tell what kind of love do they feel, but I believe they DO love. I've experienced too many moments of deep affection from my horse to think otherwise.

 

I agree with the thinking that we can form bonds with them, but love, not so much.
Sure, on days when I am feeling like a girl and get sentimental about my Ponehs and have a Black Stallion moment, I think "ahh, Stiltsy wuvs me!".
But in reality I know its not like human love, but rather I am the girl who provides leadership(trust & respect), safety and most importantly food! Much like a mare provides for her foal and they form a bond through those actions.

 

I believe love humans express is based on trust, mutual respect, attraction (mental and physical XD), loyalty and the need to protect each other's mental and physical well being.

Pretty similar to how a horse might "love" us? Kind of. But for a horse (barr perhaps physical attraction) these instincts are that- instincts. They rely on herd members to protect them from predators, they trust each other with their life to alert they to danger, there is a heirarchy of respect, and each individual member of the heard protects the others through their awareness of their surroundings. So horses feel these emotions on a daily basis towards every member of their heard.

When we add a human to the equation, the horse may show these emotions much more strongly, and I believe this is because over time they realise you: a single, small human, can single handedly offer even more that the heard does. We are a natural predator so therefore we can fight and defend the horse. We offer all the above, plus food, your undivided attention, the chance to learn how to please you through training, and they can sense the dependance we humans form on them. As forgiving, heard animals, its instinct to offer support.

They enjoy the trust, respect, stability and protection we ofer- a horse needs for them so forms a feeling of loyalty towards you. Love?

Perhaps, but I'm pretty sure my horse isnt thinking 'wow I love my human because they love me too'. More like 'my human = safe, my human= good creature to team up with' Then again, do we really know what horses think??


Side Note:
I usually try to stear clear of the phrase 'that horse loves you' especially when teaching or offering advice, but mayby horses can love in a sense, but not quite the same sense as human love. Its hard to explain.

 

I think people get too wrapped around the word "love" like only humans can truly love one another.

I think that's hogwash.

Animals (and yes, humans are animals) are capable of more than most people might think, I believe.

How do you know if how horse's feel "love" is somehow on a lesser- or even a wildly different way than humans? You don't. Horses can't talk.

I've known horses I've fed, and been the alpha, and took care of, and I could be "a member of the herd" all day long and they wouldn't care less.

I've also known horses who I didn't feed, and only rode, and yet the connection and bond between us was so much stronger.

Now, don't get me wrong. I don't think you should think that you and the horse down the block have a magikal bond and his luve for you is gonna save you from a bad fall from your stupidity. I also think that a horse "loving" a human is more rare than it is common.

I love my lease horse and I know he tries his best for me, but I also know he does not love me- he tolerates me. And I believe that's how most horses are with most humans. But sometimes, there's more to a human-horse relationship that just can't be defined by our language, and shouldn't be held back by our standard of "love".

 

True love is a deep connection, not snuggling or kissing or hugging or buying each other presents.

I know they feel love, but not the human way. We kind of jazz it up and make it into a circus show IMOP. Which is fine, because it feels good to do that But horses keep things simple and honest.

 

I will just say I don't really know the truth of it. I've heard a lot of people say they can't really love, not the way people love. All I know is what some of my horses do, and it sure feels like love to me.

Dragon was born and raised here. When he was a baby he would curl up beside me and lay his head in my lap (got to be a bit of a problem when he got bigger, LOL!) When he sees me now, he immediately calls to me and will come running to me from anywhere at a whistle. He then bends his head over my shoulder and literally hugs me with his head. Sometimes while nickering softly. Feels an awful lot like love to me.

 

Yes, I think horses can feel love.

 

Love isn't a feeling in my book. It's action that comes from feelings of affection. That being said, my horses show that they love me every day. Of course, different species express love differently, and I would never expect an animal to show "human love". Doesn't mean it's any less powerful, just different. It's even more beautiful because we can never fully understand it.

When Vic leaves his herd to come rest his head over my shoulder, that's his kind of love.

 

I ~know~ that my gelding feels a strong affection and bond with me - and it is pecisely that which Aristotle defines as a type of love - "Philia." Interestingly enough, in the ancient works that I've perused, I haven't seen "human" as a descriptive... Love is just love in its many forms. And it's my personal opinion that humans don't have the market cornered when it comes to "loving." Other species have definitively demonstrated empathy, grief, love and anger/hate.

My boy doesn't have herd mates. I'm all he has except for my other animals, and he does enjoy interacting with my chickens, dogs, and cats. He knows each by name too. And he definitely demonstrates affection for me. He nickers at me, nuzzles me, tickles me, and stares into my eye/s quite often for what feels like an extended length of time. We just "connect." He stands cheek to cheek with me, tries to hide his face behind me when the vet is examining him, and visibly calms when I softly sing to him. He seeks me out to touch face to face, and he stands still for me when I need a hug and just walk up put my arm around him. I cannot deny the mutual bond and affection that we share. And I have never had this close of a bond with any other horse I've had before.

When using the ancient Greek classifications for love...
I wouldn't say that it "eros" or erotic love (falling in love), or "agape" which is unconditional God-like love... But I know it is "philia" and perhaps even "storge," because I am his family now, his herd.

I'm LOVING this discussion!!! I hope people keep sharing!

 

All of mine are so different. My gelding isnt interested in bonding with me. After walking in circles trying to avoid me for a minute or two, he will stand nicely to be scratched and petted, but thats it. Hes sort of a loner.
my mares are more interested in bonding with me. my pony mare will now come to the fence when I come home from work.

But my appy mare, I believe does love me. I can go out just to clean up manure in the pasture, or clean stalls or something, and she will stop what shes doing, eating or whatever, to come put her head on my shoulder and see me for a few minutes, and then go back to whatever it was. she gets super excited anytime she hears me open the gate at the bottom of the driveway, and Ive been told she gets excited when she hears my truck also. sometimes in the middle of the day if she sees me in the kitchen window, she will come to the close side of the fence and call to me until I come out to see her. Truly my heart horse. I wont know what to do when she passes. Shes 21 and has some medical issues, and I constantly stress over how hard it will be.

 

Well, hard to say.,. Our horses are forced to rely on us for food, water, shelter so the depend on us to live. We love them like no other love but people in gerneral don't know what love is. Clingy people think their love is so great when it's not and people who "love" each other do horrible things to one another, people fall into lust and call it love. So many people don't know what love is, I know what love is because I would do anything for my horse, her happyness trumps what I want.

We have trained horses to obey us and listen to us and respect us. I think they can show affection and have SOME human type emotions. Some horses will try to comfort their owners if they are really sad or something but to say love ... No I don't think they can truly love us. But I do think that they respect us and enjoy us being with them which may come off to a person as love but love is just a word we created.

If you read the deffinition of love which is basically a strong passionate affection for a person, personal attachment or deep affection for a parent, child or friend. Have a strong liking for; take pleasure in. Exc

I think that's a human emotion but to love is to respect...

Hmm now I'm confusing myself lol!

 

It used to be that when horses acted up people just thought they were being stubborn, and so they punished them. Now people believe that most bad behavior is caused by pain, fear or a lack of leadership. If you believe negative behavior is caused by an instinctual response to stimuli, then how can you argue that positive behavior is different?

I suppose you can call affectionate behavior love if you want, but it's just an instinct like any other. Social animals need to stay together to survive and so they are born with the instinct to form bonds with others. I would just call it attachment myself... But then I think the same is true of most human relationships.

 

Yes, I understand your point. The human animal learns through positive and negative reinforcement as well. When I was going through college I had to study Sociology and Developmental Psychology, and the question of "nature vs nurture" was a hot and heavy topic for a while simply because our environment and positive/negative reinforcements truly do shape who we are and how we act as people.

 

Wow there have been some good responses here, and I've had to take a few days off to contemplate...

There are different kinds of love. We all know that. We love our friends differently than we love our spouses... and love our parents differently than we love our friends... Are any of these types of love any better or any less than the other? Or are they all expressions of "love?" From what I can tell, love has a myriad of forms. People "love" their jobs if they're lucky....

As far as instinct goes... I've really had to think about that Pony Boy. I guess I'm still kinda "sitting on that egg till it hatches," too. Humans are social animals born with the instinct to bond, just as horses are. So in that respect we are similar even though we are different species. So basically human animals form bonds and relationships because it's hard wired in - part of our nature as a species. So we bond with friends and family and siblings etc., and call it, in its many forms, love...

I do not think horses feel "eros" type of love for people, or for each other as far as I can tell from the outside looking in...

They definitely display "storge" or familial (herd) love amongst each other. In lieu of having a herd to bond with, I believe my gelding has extended that "storge" love to include me. It is a well accepted fact that horses are, indeed, capable of bonding with humans. Arabians were specifically bred for that characteristic among others. To the Bedouin, a horse needed to bond with its owner.

Agape love, or unconditional love.... I've never seen a horse display that either and, sadly, I've RARELY seen humans display that love (Mother Teresa and Ghandi maybe....), so in that respect we're not that different... Although a few human animals have managed to display that kind of love and I can't think of any horses who have.

But Philila... The bond that forms between fiends... It's affection and does not involve attraction or sexuality. It involves common interests and happy interactions that cause beings to seek each other out for companionship and interaction... as for that type of "love" I do believe horses are capable simply because I've witnessed it. I've witnessed horses seeking out the attention of their owners when they weren't hungry or needing anything from them - except happy, even playful, interaction.

So I'm not trying to anthropomorphize. I'm simply trying to understand the nature of joyful friendship/interaction that can exist between species. For those of us who have witnessed a horse mourning... Is that anthropomorphizing too? Mourning is "assumed" to be strictly a human characteristic - or it USED to be considered that way. When great apes learned sign language, the very landscape of human understanding of what other species are capable of understanding, feeling, and thinking shifted dramatically. We now know as scientific fact, that other species CAN feel empathy, can mourn, can get depressed etc.

So after more careful consideration of differing opinions posted...
Yes, I do agree that anthropomorphizing does other species a great disservice. However, watching a horse display affection to a human isn't exactly anthropomorphizing... It's observing and then contemplating the meaning however great or small.

I tried to define "love" in the beginning of this thread according to ancient Greek philosophy so that we could distinguish between differing forms of LOVE. So I'm not referring to romantic love, or Eros, when I think about how my gelding and I interact so affectionately.

 

Not in the human sense of the word. They absolutely can show affection and loyalty though. Through human eyes, I think that is often interpreted as love.

Great bonds can be formed, out of dependency first & foremost - we are their source of food, water, & shelter. Those bonds are then forged with respect & leadership. Once we have gained their trust, loyalty & respect follows.

So, love - no. Great bonds & relationships - absolutely.

 

That's exactly my point!
Great bonds and relationships, loyalty and trust and respect... they all fall under the "philia" category of "Love" in ancient Greek philosophy - beautiful minds like Plato and Aristotle.

 

I know my horse loves me... I feed him at the same times day and night and only in his stall so he knows when he will be fed...but other times of the day, if I am just out there cleaning, or whatever, he ALWAYS trots over to me "talking all the way" and just has to hang out with me and attempt to assist with my chore of the day... he does not leave my side, which sometimes can be a pain, but he just really "likes" to hang out with me.... if I am out front doing yard work, I will let him out of the pasture, and he just hangs out with me in the front yard... yes, he does LOVE me, I'm sure of it!!!!