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My mare is very good and well mannered, save a few things. Actually, save one big thing:lol:. She doesn't respect me at all! When i tack her up in her stall, she turns and circles and wont stand still. She also doesn't respect my space as much as I'd like, and when she doesn't want to, she will not move, ie back up or move over. Another big thing that I found out was when I try to free lunge her, she straight up resents and kicks out at me. When i saw that I put her on the lunge line, but I don't like keeping her on the line because she doesn't have the best shoulders. What can i do to gain her respect?
 

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There are many regulars here & in today's horse world who are very into their horses "respecting" them, so I'm going to leave it to them.

What I want to say is that many people don't discern between the horse disrespecting them & just being curious or wanting to be closer to the person. For example, some people say it's disrespectful for a horse to ever sniff or nuzzle your hand (NOT chomp your finger off, but just investigate), & those people slap a horse for his natural curiosity!

Be careful about a horse who doesn't need to be slapped or otherwise reprimanded, & who'll only get worse if treated that way.

The best advice will come from your horse. See what effect your friendliness has, what effect your firmness has.
 

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"Very good and well mannered" and won't stand still, won't move, KICKS out at you are very conflicting statements. You're right to know that it is a serious problem that you should fix sooner rather than later before you or someone else gets hurt.

She has no respect for you, therefore you must earn and demand nothing less. Start with the basics: Groundwork, simple things such as leading properly, backing up, getting her to move her body where you want when you want. Get it down to as little as a fly's worth of pressure on her body for her to give you an answer. It's all about the pressure and release.

As for the moving around when you are trying to tack up; don't let her get away with any of it. If it means taking her to another area to tie her up or bolting a hook in her stall then do it. You will have to learn to speak her language because right now I suspect it's all loves and happiness but to her that means she can't see you as a solid leader and needs to make her own decisions to protect herself. It's a natural instinct for them.

You will need to learn to firmly talk to her in a way that she understands before you can have a safe, happy relationship with her where you call the shots.

Stay safe and good luck!
 

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Fair and just, not a bully. Lightning fast to correct poor behavior, give them space when they're good and at times something special like a scratch or gentle massage depending on what they like.

Too many people let their anger or fear control them, which just makes every situation 500x worse.

More work is better to correct behavior than physical discipline. The only time I hit a horse is if they are putting me or others in immediate danger and I need to KILL that idea of theirs ASAP. Kind of like when the lead mare wallops on a misbehaving member of the herd. It's quick and then they move on.
 

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Hi there,
I have a 4 year old Andalusian and while I've been riding a long time, this is my first training experience. I was starting to have issues with her respecting me in certain instances. She is great to handle, but was becoming barn and buddy sour which is just another form of disrespect.
To get help with this, I have subscribed to Warwick Schiller's site. He is amazingly helpful. He does not ever hit horses. He might tap them with a whip but nothing crazy. I've seen far worse in local rings! I suggest starting with his Youtube channel. You can get some ideas there even if you don't want to pay for the whole thing.

:)
M
 

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Id say your a bit confused there on what is a well mannered horse. Doesnt stand still for saddling invades your space and kickout at you while free lunging. Thats a big time DISRESPECTFULL HORSE....

I would not tolerate any of that from one of my horses they be having a come to jesus meeting in a big hurry.
 

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Your horse is the opposite of well mannered...well mannered would mean the horse didn't do any of the above.

The horse needs ground work, ground work and more ground work. And not some free lunging join up crap. But some attention getting ground work that shows her YOUR the boss.

Horses are to big to act in a dangerous way...they are not puppy dogs but 1200lb animals with a mind of their own. So they need to respect us 120lb creatures.
 
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If you surf youtube, I suggest you look at the Clinton Anderson videos. He was very helpful to me.

I would tie your horse for one. A lot. I would tie her for grooming and tacking and I'd even tie her while you clean stalls and do general barn chores.

I would also do a ton of ground work. Walk her on the lunge line. When you stop, she should stop. If she crowds you, back her up. Lead her around everywhere. If you have to walk to the trailer to get your saddle, take her with you. If you want to watch a friend ride, take her with you. If you go to shows, bring her with you wherever you go. Everytime she crowds you, back her up. I would back her up all the time.

When you enter the stall, make her go in backwards. Back her down the aisle and into your stall. Work on having her move away from you. If you walk towards her butt, she should move away from you. etc....

Good luck....
 

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My mare is very good and well mannered, save a few things. Actually, save one big thing:lol:. She doesn't respect me at all! When i tack her up in her stall, she turns and circles and wont stand still. She also doesn't respect my space as much as I'd like, and when she doesn't want to, she will not move, ie back up or move over. Another big thing that I found out was when I try to free lunge her, she straight up resents and kicks out at me. When i saw that I put her on the lunge line, but I don't like keeping her on the line because she doesn't have the best shoulders. What can i do to gain her respect?
your horse is not well mannered at all,not if she does these things. I won't blame her, because she will only be as well mannered as you require (not ask, REQUIRE) . just like really wonderful kids can become real brats if the parents allow them. these are kids that really want to be good, but they have no clear boundaries, nor any enforcement of such. They will soon be sassing the mom that tries to make them behave.

Ok, so you know your mare is not being as good as she should and can be.
First of all, while you try to change things up, don't do your disciplining in the stall. I don't think you should tack up a horse in a stall unless they DO respect your space, and you CAN move them over if needed. tack her up out of the stall to start with.
In a nutshell, you have to be very clear about what you ask, and make sure that you get a real change from your horse in response. And work to making that change better and better. And ALWAYS require the same level of response to your requests to move over and such.
I know that is very general and doesn't help you in specifics. There are tons of threads here on how to back up a horse, or move it or round pen it. all kinds of opinions and specifics. you would truly be best to get some lessons from someone, face to face. They can watch how you interact with your horse and point out to you where you are allowing things to slide by , things that build a lack of respect from your horse toward you.

and NO, just because I do think you should have a certain level of respect from your horse does not automatically mean I believe you have to slap them for sniffing you out of curiosity. It's all in HOW the horse puts its' head toward you. Is it doing that with a "may I?" approach, or is it "You're mine!" approach?
I think that you start by learning to move your horse back away from you, move the shoulders over, the hind and getting them to lead up nicely. It's really best if you take some lesson with someone who can show you how to move the hrose around
 

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Discussion Starter · #11 ·
Thanks, I will definitely be more careful with what I am allowing. Also the Warwick videos helped a lot! Thanks!!
 
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I second the tying--wondering why your mare isn't tied while you are tacking up, anyway?
 

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Discussion Starter · #13 ·
I second the tying--wondering why your mare isn't tied while you are tacking up, anyway?
Where I ride we don't tie our horses- as a safety issue and just because they were never taught. We have crossties, and everyone tacks in the stall/ on the crossties, I dont know, it's just something we do:)
 

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Hello!
Maybe try bonding again!! Bring her treats every day, tell her what a good girl she is! (except when she's bad;) )
Be ready for her to do any of these things, in the stable, don't take any nonsense, YOU'RE the boss, and she's going to have to realise that!! Walk into the stall confident, don't let any doubts creep into your head, if she starts doing these circles, be sharp!! Tell her off but don't bully her!!
 
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Hello!
Maybe try bonding again!! Bring her treats every day, tell her what a good girl she is! (except when she's bad;) )
Be ready for her to do any of these things, in the stable, don't take any nonsense, YOU'RE the boss, and she's going to have to realise that!! Walk into the stall confident, don't let any doubts creep into your head, if she starts doing these circles, be sharp!! Tell her off but don't bully her!!
Please don't do this. Your going to end up with a spoiled, nippy, pushy horse who crowds your space.

Why does you tie your mare up for tacking?
You can do it right in the stall. At least keep a lead on her and stop her. Heck, I'd let it drag on the ground and let her step on it. She'd probably realize pretty quick that circles are NOT going to be comfortable.

As for kicking, are you sure its AT you? I allow my horses to get their heebejeebees out in the round pen when the weather changes. They know the round pens means its their chance to blow off some steam. If they are kicking AT me I wrap that lunge line around the bums HARD as many times as I can if I can reach them and make them RUN. I've had t happen a few times but its next be a problem. If she is on the lunge line a firm jerk and a "HEY!" will help too.

You horse need tough love. Someone has to run the show and if your not willing to she is going to step up to the plate. That's when things go badddd.
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These training things take time, patience, and trust (YOURS, more than hers).

Put her in the spot you want her, and say, STAND! Not, whoa honeysugarbabysweetiebooboo. Then you turn and walk. IF she moves, you go back, put her in the SAME spot, say STAND! with a good yank on the halter, and walk away. Repeat all day if needed. When she stands and waits for you, pet her and proceed with what you were doing, but still insist she stand still. It is not hard IF you TRUST the horse to DO it.
Be careful not to put her in the spot, then slowly release the lead rope, and tenatively back up, saying whoaeasyhoneybooboodarlingwhoadontmovesweetie. TRUST and be confident to give the horse the correct message.

Nancy
 

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Please don't do this. Your going to end up with a spoiled, nippy, pushy horse who crowds your space.

Why does you tie your mare up for tacking?
You can do it right in the stall. At least keep a lead on her and stop her. Heck, I'd let it drag on the ground and let her step on it. She'd probably realize pretty quick that circles are NOT going to be comfortable.

As for kicking, are you sure its AT you? I allow my horses to get their heebejeebees out in the round pen when the weather changes. They know the round pens means its their chance to blow off some steam. If they are kicking AT me I wrap that lunge line around the bums HARD as many times as I can if I can reach them and make them RUN. I've had t happen a few times but its next be a problem. If she is on the lunge line a firm jerk and a "HEY!" will help too.

You horse need tough love. Someone has to run the show and if your not willing to she is going to step up to the plate. That's when things go badddd.
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this is a good idea for training, but not to do IN the stall, with a tentative girl in with the horse. training should first be done out in a small paddock or round pen, not in an enclosed space.
 

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Where I ride we don't tie our horses- as a safety issue and just because they were never taught. We have crossties, and everyone tacks in the stall/ on the crossties, I dont know, it's just something we do:)[/QUO

Every horse needs to learn how to stand tied that should be part of their training. Tacking up a disrespectfull horse in a stall isnt a good idea.

Id be tacking her up in the round pen alot safer for you if the horse decides to act out. Every horse i own knows how to stand tied,they stand still no pawing or dancing around.

What ever you do dont use treats to bribe her with that will only make her more disrespectfull. I NEVER hand feed any of my horses treats...if i give treats its in a feed pan.If they get pushy about the treat then they dont get it.
 

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Your horse is the opposite of well mannered...well mannered would mean the horse didn't do any of the above.

The horse needs ground work, ground work and more ground work. And not some free lunging join up crap. But some attention getting ground work that shows her YOUR the boss.

Horses are to big to act in a dangerous way...they are not puppy dogs but 1200lb animals with a mind of their own. So they need to respect us 120lb creatures.

Agree you need to be boss, but sorry - that free lunging, join up 'crap' is the first step. It is not all lovey dovey sweet talk. It is serious, do as I say, don't turn your a** to me -- WORK. It sets a standard of behavior and interaction with the horse. The best horsemen/cowboys in the World do it and let me tell you, their horses don't put a foot out of place under saddle.
 

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There are many regulars here & in today's horse world who are very into their horses "respecting" them, so I'm going to leave it to them.
You know I rather like to have respect in all my relationships, be it my dogs, horses, kids or husband, I've given up with the cat, she doesn't do respect.

Respect is based on different things in all those relationships, and it isn't the bad thing that you appear to imply at times. In no case does respect = fear, or domination, it is just that respect.

Fact, I owned a stud for a while, never hit him, or was bad to him, but he respected my personal space, to the extent that he fell on his knees one day to avoid crowding me, LOL that was because a mare was putting him in his place.

Respect is good, mutual respect is the basis of any sound relationship.
 
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