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Discussion Starter #1
I haven't said much about this. As some of you know I started a barn, with someone I considered a friend. Unfortunately things went from good, to bad, to worse. The climax (or anti-climax as the case may be) is the mare passing away. It is in my firm belief it could have been prevented. Not only this but my "friend" and I had a falling out, that just wasn't going to get better.

When I brought it to the attention of the people we lease from, I volunteered to leave. The partnership was dissolved, I found a place to move my horses. I lost the place I needed to keep giving my lessons, lost where I could continue to train the horses I was being paid to train. (But I had found a new barn where I could do these so it wasn't looking so bad)
The last horse I was working on went home last night. I got an email from the owner of the horse, which basically said he had a rather "interesting" conversation with the "friend" and now he won't be bringing me the further 6 horses I was to train for him.

So now, I've lost income from lessons, and in one fell swoop, lost another more potential income. Now I have to pay $1100 a month in board, which I really can't afford without my training/lesson income. All this would be something to deal with but apparently now I've been character assassinated, and in this small horse community it won't take long for the bad word to spread even further. I, on the other hand, haven't said passed on my opinion of these people to anyone.

I'll admit I wasn't entirely professional when airing my concerns. It's taking everything I have to not sell my horses and be done with it all entirely. I keep telling myself, just get through this day, tomorrow will be better. But then something else comes up from it, and I'm continually getting kicked.

The karma bus has run me over big time. I will most definitely not ever go into business with someone again. Particularly horse business.
 

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sorry to hear that,because i know by your previous posts you were[over the moon] about you new venture, a man once told me that a partnership, is the only ship guaranteed to sink,theres not much you can do about your ex mate giving you a bad name,only try to explain to the ones that mention it, only problem is there will be plenty that won,t and just take what the other one says as the truth, all the best anyway
 

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Discussion Starter #4
Yeh Jimmy, you're not wrong. Thankfully I have quite a few friends in this part of town that know me and are squashing whatever they hear if they hear it. I just hate that folks would think bad of me. Most particularly since in my opinion I was looking out for the horses. After all, it was my job to do so.

Argh. Particularly cruddy situation.
 

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I would send an email to the person that cancelled the 6 horses and tell him there are 2 sides to every story and while you would like to take the high road and not bash anyone your lively hood is at stake and would like to explain your side. Then do so very professionally
 

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Discussion Starter #6
Yeh I understand what you're getting at, and I agree, but part of me is like there's no real point trying to explain. It'll just make me look bitter, which I am LOL!
 

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I'm very sorry to hear that :-( It amazes me how some people act sometimes. Just keep your chin up and do the best you can. It's all anyone can do, things will get better for you.

Do you think it would do any good to talk to the guy and see why he left?
 

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Make sure you explain to the man what really happened so that he knows both sides and doesn't perpetuate the rumors that your "friend" has been spreading. Then give the friend a call and make darn sure that she knows that you will not stand for that behavior and you will not participate in it either. Don't let the actions of one person change who you are. Put an ad in the paper and try to get some more clients. The best way you can get back at her is to be a resounding success with your own business. Tell everyone you talk to that moving out of that barn was the best thing that ever happened to you.
 

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^^^ Wise words, there. I admire your refusal to sink to the trash talking your ex-partner has, and while it sucks for now in the long run that will only make you look better. Kevin has the right idea. Go on about your business and try to round up more clients. Explain the situation honestly to those who ask you, with as little justification as possible, but leave it at that. Don't sit down to have b!tch sessions with new clients, because then you are only spreading the bad rep yourself. Ignore it, if you have the skills to back your business up, people will realize that soon enough.
 

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Things do happen and feelings to get hurt, that is also (my rule anyways), you can never make business with friends. It just does not work, there are to many emotions to keep it business.

Despite what happened, I really don't think you should fall apart and let a single person(which was followed by some new clients) take over your dream and your career. You are in a business that is all word of mouth, alllll of it, and you will always turn out to have people who will not like you-regardless of what you do. That's just the nature of the business.

It sounds like you are a good trainer, or at least a trainer that people in your area want. Stay professional and simply explain to those clients who just left you, what happened. Keep it simple, keep it clean, don't say anything negative about them(because it will show bad character and very unprofessional), and move on. Find a new location to give lessons and train horses, spread the word, put some posters up (maybe some adds), and let this start up again. You will get new clients, you will become a successful trainer and you will not let this take you down so easily. You cannot give up on all of this, if you had that much going on.
 

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urgh, the horse business is so much like high school from what ive seen/heard. :/

i hope everything gets better! good on ya ffor keepin going and not sinking as low as your 'friend' has! i promise, if you keep on fighting to stay afloat it will all work out in the end. good luck!! :)
 

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I'm so sorry you're going through this. I am experiencing a similar (though not nearly as big of a deal) situation. All I can say is to keep your chin up and take the high road. People will see the situation for what it is eventually and your refusal to stoop to the level of your ex-partner will make you shine all the more. In the meantime, try to focus on your own horses and let them help you through this in that special way only horses can. A nice long trail ride can fix a lot of problems (and a nice long hot bath!!). Best of luck to you.
 

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I agree with my2geldings. You can't lie down on this but that doesn't mean that you have to be loud about it either. I think you should go and visit the man whose horse you trained - you can always say you are coming to see how the horse is going. And then see where it leads. After all, it shouldn't affect how you train your horses. Hold your head high. What goes around, comes around. But get out there. You sound a bit down about it but time heals all, just be true to yourself.
 

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JTM,
I just saw your thread. I am sorry to hear of the new developments since we spoke of this whole thing.
There has been some really great advice posted here. I do believe that this was probly a good thing even tho it doesnt appear that way at the moment.

I think Kevin had a great suggestion for you. Put an add in the paper. Make yourself some professional looking flyers and put them in places to be seen by horse people.
In my experience, when things of this nature come about it usually takes a bit for things to settle and then the truth comes about. Usually by some other person's misfortune. More than likely these folks will have someone who see's the forest through the trees, and in turn consequences will come forth for those who have done the wrong thing.
You stick to what you do best ride, train, give lessons and stand by who you are. Get back out there and it will happen.
The Best to you!
Halfpass
 
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