[Lexiie]

So today, my mom told me that she might be fired from her job of over 45 years. She's 61, and a year away from retirement. My father died when I was 2 1/2 so she's supporting me, 16, and my adopted sister, 10.
She has three chances. The people she works with don't want her around anymore because she understands the system and they don't so it makes them feel inferior.
The reason they say they're going to fire her is because they don't like the faces she makes, her body language, or her tone of voice.
This is really upsetting because if she is fired or if she retires at 62(which she's planning on doing) the money she'll be getting afterwards is only a third of what she's making now.
I've been leasing my horse for almost three years now, and we've grown so close. It'll be devastating to loose her. The lease is 300 dollars a month.
I told my mom that if she's fired or retires that I'll stop leasing my horse, and get rid of my cellphone.
At some point next week I'll be applying all over town for a job. It's really hard because it's such a small town, and there's no jobs open. Also I'm 16, so I'm sure there's limitations on things I'm allowed/not allowed to do.
*sigh*
I feel a little better now. I'm not really worried about loosing my horse because I'll still be able to see her and everything. It's just gonna hurt knowing that she's not mine. She's what I look forward to every day. It's like losing your soul.
I'm really worried about what's going to happen to my family. </3
We can JUST pay the bills as it is. I'm just scared. It's not like my mom could get another job either, she doesn't have any other skills, and no one wants to hire someone who's ONE year away from retiring.

 

[Skipsfirstspike]

I am impressed with your reaction-- how you are willing to give up your cell phone and your horse to help out your mom and your family. Not an easy thing, I can only imagine. -
I do not have much in the way of advice. I hope you get your part time job, I hope your mom gets to keep hers. I hope you don't have to give up your horse. -
Hope springs eternal.-
Best wishes for you and your family.

 

[Lexiie]

Thank you very much

 

[DuffyDuck]

They say where there is a will, there is a way.

Best of luck to you. Its horrific that they are letting her go... is there no workers tribunal, or any way she can say its unfair? Shouldn't she have been given a verbal warning, then a written one, and then dismissed?

I hope this all workd out for you, and well done to you for making the adult decisions about your lease and phone.

I am sure you can always find odd jobs.. raking leaves off lawns, window washing, hoovering houses, dog walking, babysitting.... the opportunities are endless.. advertise as doing odd jobs etc and see what comes up.

Best of luck to you!

 

[Lexiie]

That's what I'm hoping to do thank you<3

 

[GreySorrel]

Duffy Duck had some great ideas, and I hope you can find something. Is there a way you can ask to muck stalls or help feed and water to help cut some small cost off of the fee you pay for the horse you use? Is that a possibility? Sweep down the aisles, work off some of her fee?

You are very mature on this and I commend you.

 

[Lexiie]

I do that stuff anyway haha! My barn isn't very nice, but the horses are always fed, watered, and hayed.
My riding instructor can't afford to pay me because she gets ger money from lessons.
The board money goes directly to feed, hay, and bedding. I'm sure she'd let me ride. Absolutely sure. But I would never take advantage of her like that. I've known her since I was a baby.
She'd tell me "well if you help clean stalls and feed, i'll give you a couple lessons. How's that?"
She's one of the sweetes ladies ever.
Luckily, I worked one of our winter camps, and she gave me a few free lessons which I haven't taken yet.
Thank you for the suggestion
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[NeuroticMare]

If you can't find a "proper" job, what about self employment?

There is a group of teenagers your age in my area that are the "Scooper Troopers", and it's just what it sounds, they come and clean up dog poop in yards. Not the most luxurious job, but they make a lot of money! There are three of them and they are now 17 and 18 and driving nice cars and such. It is a job that a LOT of people are willing to pay someone else to do it. And to start? You just need a scooper, garbage bags and a place to dump it.

Also, consider putting up ads for babysitting, and pet sitting. No, you can't do over nights at your age likely, but you can go to the neighbors to walk the dogs, clean the cat boxes, brush everyone and feed them.

I had a very successful pet sitting business from the time I was 12 until about 16, if you want any help making up flyers or whatever, let me know! I can draw you up a professional looking one that you can print out.

I'm sure there are other ideas out there too, that's what worked for me. Also, check places like the local hardware store or meat market, they often don't have a ton of teens knocking down their doors because it isn't as "glamorous" as a shoe store or ice cream shop, but they usually pay well and you'd be surprised with how much of the hardware type stuff you already know because you hang out in a barn!

 

[Lexiie]

I was thinking about aplying to ACE Hardware. It's not too far.
Thank you for offering to make me flyers! I'm be contacting you soon (/
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[Big Black Crow]

Hmmm, I'm trying to be very diplomatic here...so please take this as not cutting your mother down but building her up instead.

It sounds like your mother is burned out. Would you want to be around someone that makes faces, gives you negative attitude and makes you feel like you are inferior? If she is truly doing those things at work that means she is unhappy and unfulfilled at her job. That is a bad situation for both your Mom and her employer. She needs to sit down with her bosses and talk options. If they have given her a warning, then she needs to either address the reason behind her attitude at work and try to be happy again....or look for a new job. Maybe if she took retirement and got a part time job she could love then she'd be fulfilled again.

The worst part about being a grown up is having to do things we don't want to do because we have responsibilities. Sometimes you've got to think of work at a less than fulfilling job as the means to the end. That end is spending 8 hours doing something you don't like so that you can live 8 hours doing what does make you happy. Sometimes you just gotta fake it through. If she is at the point where she can no longer do that(and after 45 years who could blame her!) then she will be much happier finding a new job and getting a fresh start.

I send strength to you and your family. Everything happens for a reason. If this job ends for your mom, maybe it's setting her free to do something she will love. You are a good girl to jump in and be willing to make sacrifices and your Mom is an amazing lady to take care of you and your sister on her own for so long. She deserves to be happy. I hope whatever changes come bring her to that happy place. The first step is always the hardest.

 

[MHFoundation Quarters]

I have to say I agree with skips, your reaction shows a fantastic amount of maturity! If you were in my area, I'd let you ride here anytime on my dime, love that attitude!

What may happen to your mom is sad and even more sad that it's a fairly common thing anymore. I know more than a couple people who've been let go just shy of retirement so the company they worked for didn't have to pay out as much in pension.

I wish I had some advice for you in addition to what others have said already, but I don't so I will send well wishes and prayers your way. Good luck and hope everything works out.

 

[Lexiie]

Thank you guys<33
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[Rachel1786]

I'm sorry lexie, I'm on my phone so I can't type much, but come summer we will be looking for more help at the kennel. I know its a little far but u could stay at my house the night before so ur mom wouldn't have to drive you. Don't forget, I'll be haveing u babysit soon too. Everything will work out, see you later.
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[mildot]

Its horrific that they are letting her go... is there no workers tribunal, or any way she can say its unfair? Shouldn't she have been given a verbal warning, then a written one, and then dismissed?

No, no, and no.

The majority of employment in the US is "at will". That means that the employer can let an employee go for any reason, or no reason at all. That also means the employee can resign for any reason, or no reason at all.

There's nothing unfair about getting fired for unprofessional behavior at work.

It has been my experience (and I have been in professional employment for 18 years) that when someone is getting fired for this:

the faces she makes, her body language, or her tone of voice.

the behavior has been going on for quite some time and there have been warnings and discussions with the employee about it. Very seldomly does someone get the boot for doing such things for the first time or once in a great while.

 

[lilbit11011]

I feel for you and believe you are showing some great character in willing to give up your stuff to help your family.

I understand your situation on a personal level. My parent's divorce was pretty nasty and I ended up moving back to mom's house to help her pay bills and take care of my two younger siblings (I was 19 at the time). Nothing like inheriting a full family at that age and working a full time job...lol. It takes a lot out of you to make the decisions you have made. Even though you know it's best, you just wanna scream and say no.


Not sure about around you...but around here 16 is the starting limit for hiring. Most places will not let you work past a certain time unless you get a waiver signed by your parents and even then some don't let you at all. I think it's like 10 or 11pm though. I would just try to a part time job (even if it is something you are not that interested in) and usually if you work hard and show a good sense of maturity they tend to notice. If that doesn't pan out......everyone else had great suggestions on doing some jobs around the neighborhood.

Just keep up the good work and I believe with your attitude you can do it.

 

[Lexiie]

I got my working papers when I was 14, but a lot of people won't hire younger kids
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[BlueSpark]

I did odd jobs, Was hired for jobs with weird hours, worked weekends, and came up with "self employment" opportunities. I scooped poop, worked at an auction mart, did cleaning, worked as an aid on a school bus, and sold crafts. I bought my first horse at 15, a saddle and bridle at 16(that took alot of saving) and have had horses ever since. My parents have never contributed to my horses. Board, vet, farrier, shows, tack, I paid everything from the time I bought my first at 15 and through high school. I bought My first car, paid rent and food from 17 on. Now I am pitching in a good chunk of my wages towards their food and morgage during a tough time while my dad gets started in a new career.

 

[kait18]

i am so sorry to hear this. i hope everything works out. and i am very proud of you on the way you are handling this.

also would like to offer you riding time with my horses (the good ones of course). if your location is correct your 30-45 minutes away..plus i bet there are trails between us we can join up at to ride my horses that are closer to you.

i am sending prayers and wishes your way in hopes of everything working out.

as for money making...
collect bottles, cans, etc you can collect a small fortune over time.. 5 cents to 25 cents per empty bottle or something like that.. my sister does it for spare change...

other that that everyone had great ideas

 

[Lexiie]

My friend, Rachel, thinks you're in Jersey. Thank.you so so so much for your offer!
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[kait18]

techincally jersey but literally right next to the pa bridge lol