I suggest you start buying the Practicle Horesman magazine and start studdying George Morris's columns where riders send picturs in for him to critique.
If you do not know who George Morris is, he is the Guru of Hunters in North America, where he and a few other "Greats" started Hunters in North America. George Morris really focus's moreso on Equitation, he is a wealth of information and will help you out.
You need to move your foot back in your iron. The iron is supposed to be placed on the balls of your toes, where the outter bar is at your pinky toe and the inner bar is on the ball of your big toe.
Your heels need to be absorbing your bodies weight, they need to be anchoring you in your tack.
Your lower leg should be stuck at the girth, instead of gripping with your knee's, wrap your lower leg around your horses girth. You need to be around your horse, not ontop.
Your seat is good, but I do believe if the fence was bigger, you'd be jumping ahead. You want your seat low to your saddle, which it is and that is fabulous, and you want your seat over the center of your saddle, which it almost is, but it is a smidge towards your pommel. Push your seat back more, where it is dead smack over the center of your saddle.
Your hip angle, is far too closed. There is no need to over exaggerate your upper body like that, at all. Remember, it is our horses who close the angle for us, not us. That isn't our job. You need to work on sitting and allowing your horse to lift you out of your tack and come up to you.
The only time we should see a riders upper body, that close to their horses neck, is when they are going over a 4'0" or bigger fence.
Your release, I am not that great at releases, for I myself am working on mine.
Try and sit up a bit more. you leg looks pretty good. I've found that if I w/t around the ring 2-3 times in 2pt. it greatly helps my leg. and then i usually go over one or two jumps, staying in 2pt. hope this helps!