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Ive came here asking for advice.

I have a friend who has been through about 5-6 horses in the last year or so. She has them for fun, she doesnt sell them for profit. I am just dissapointed.

She gets a horse, and decided its not what she wants, or she dosent feel like working with them, they have health issues ect. She gets most of these horses for free, knowing they need training, and later decided she dosent feel like training them. I feel like she pawns them off on other people/ friends, auctions with meat buyers, who ever will take them. Nothing about the horse really changes, she just decided she dosent want them anymore. She cant afford a fully trained horse or full training board, but she gets upset when there horses she gets for free arent show ring fit and ready.

Since when is it ok to treat horses like disposable things? I keep my horses for life, no matter what. I know they're not going to make me a profit, that they are just money pits. When I commit to buy I commit to the horse. I cant look my horses I love in the eye and tell them they're leaving, and I have no idea if they'll end up as dog food or have a good family. I will keep my unsound middle aged mare for life, and my new baby will stay with me, even if he doesnt grow about 14 hands.

I feel sort of like there is this disattach, once you start going through so many horses. You dont care as much about them, they just become things, because they become so much more disposable looking to you.

Am I crazy? Does anyone still share my sentiments out there?? Should I just mind my own business? She is a very good friend but this sort of disgust me a little. If you dont have the time/ money dont get ununbroke horse, if you dont have the time to get to know the horse, dont buy them. Free horses are usually free for a reason, find out why. Thanks for listening to my rant.
 

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I sort of see both sides. I've had horses in the past that I sold for one reason or another. They weren't working out for what I wanted them for, or whatever. I preferred to see them someplace where they would be used rather than sitting in my pasture. I don't have time to keep more than 4 horses ridden as they should be. I also can't afford land wise to have more than 4 head.
I do get attached to them and was very particular about where they went. I cried when they pulled out of the driveway.
I've also come to terms with the fact that I can't keep every animal that comes into my possession. Guess its life on the farm, I've seen pet cows go off to slaughter and known they were later on my plate since I was a little girl.
Don't get me wrong, I love my horses, my dogs and cats. I've even had a rooster and a few chickens I was attached to. I also know that nothing lasts forever, even me.
Maybe your friend sees the horses as livestock. I see nothing wrong with that as long they are well cared for while she has them. I also see nothing wrong with your way of seeing things. I suggest you live and let live :)
 

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Thank you, Vida. My sentiments exactly.

OP, what are you looking for, exactly? Justification that your opinion is morally right and your friend is an abusive, unfeeling, uncaring asshat?

I'm afraid you're not going to get that from those of us who have had animals for a long time, and know that different ways of doing things aren't always wrong, just different.

As long as your friend is showing good stewardship while the animals are in her possession, there really isn't anything wrong with her flipping them.

If this is a moral high ground for you, I suggest you divest yourself of this friendship. We all have hills upon which we choose to die. If this is yours, then it's time for you to find friends who have the same mindset as yourself.
 

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Should I just mind my own business?

Yes!

I wonder if your 'very good friend' would like to know you are bad mouthing her on at least two internet BBs (and that you joined a new BB just to post about her - since this was your first post here)?


Why does this bother you so much?
Because she is not a forever keeper like you so she is not as good as you?
 

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Discussion Starter #6 (Edited)
I am not looking for justification for my feelings. I was wondering everyone opinions. I am not bad mouthing anyone. I am stating how I feel and the facts. People are sometimes more emotional then rational, which is why I wanted to get other opinions. Shes not intending to flip these horses, it seems like shes just not making good choices when it comes to picking horses. And it happens again and again.

If you took a dog in, then later decided shes not potty trained, you dont want her, when you knew she wasnt trained when you got her wouldnt that be somewhat irresponsible of you?

I have not joined a new BB just to post about her, thank you for jumping to conclusions. I have joined two simmilar boards, because they are just that simmilar. They are both horse boards were I can post and read about horses....
 

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If you took a dog in, then later decided shes not potty trained, you dont want her, when you knew she wasnt trained when you got her wouldnt that be somewhat irresponsible of you?
I do not find dogs and horses comparable items, honestly. Dogs are shorter lived and cost less to keep.

Personally I own two dogs that if I knew them this well when I chose to adopt them I would not have adopted them. But now they are mine and they are mine until the end. I love them even with their faults.

Horses are different, as I said. If you do not have the finances or the training ability to keep horses that do not work for what you want a horse for I see nothing wrong with finding them a new home.

On second thought - If someone adopts a family dog that turns out to fear children, I see nothing wrong with the responsibly finding it a new home that does not have children.

I am not bad mouthing anyone.
I am guessing your 'good friend' as you call her, might not think you are not bad mouthing her if she were to read this.


I have not joined a new BB just to post about her, thank you for jumping to conclusions. I have joined two simmilar boards, because they are just that simmilar. They are both horse boards were I can post and read about horses....
This was your first post here. And the other BB I am talking about you joined in January, but .... you are not my friend and you are not posting about me. So I guess that is between you and your friend.
 

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I caught she's trying to find a horse of her own and collects mismatch ones, even she actually knows they won't prolly fit her before having them. Am I right?

Yes, personally I see that's a bit incoherent. Why waste time & energy to something that you finally decide not to keep or really profit from? I'd see it that way with boats, houses or any other more expensive stuff too.

But it's still just my view to see things. There are a lot of different ways to see it, I see your way and her way too and it's all ok and not my job to judge it, as far as that lady takes proper care of these horses during the time she owns them and pass them on some proper person. I can say I have nothing against buying and passing on horses and people who does that as a job, for profit or some other sound reason, I see their way. Perhaps I wouldn't still recommend to do it just for fun because changing envinronment stress a horse every time. I still agree with Vida, I'd suggest you to live and let live if there's nothing wrong with the conditions of the horses :).

I wouldn't personally go that way with my friends on Internet, but I don't still see that actually as badmouthing because there's no names or other things that identify the horse lady. Just a way to vent some feelings.
 

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hmmm i think 5-6 horses a year is a little over board. she needs to make sure the horse she buys is right for her before she buys... I also agree that most horses have to be sold at some point in their life.
 
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