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From my Journal (September 27, 2009) By: Delila Wagton

Like a kid in a candy store, my youthful expectations were sweetly fed this morning. Grays, Bays, and big black Addakiss entertained my highest hopes in the early muggy hours on my oval throne. Hotshot trainer Adam Smith legged me up on three horses, and Mr. Tate had Karina for me to gallop. Today was Payday for these trainers, and I more than covered my gas expense this week after they wrote my check for galloping! My ebony hero (also yesterday’s centerfold model- see September 26, 2009 I am going to be a jockey!) galloped like a Snickers candy bar- a little nutty, but overall sweet. I gave Mark a pep talk for his premiere race tonight and urged him to be a Mr. Goodbar and win.
After church, I passed out on the couch for four hours! My fiancé stopped by while I was getting ready for the races. Joshua only came by to tell me he wasn’t going with me because his buddy invited him over for a football party. Why don’t you come with me? My fiancé asked. I really did deliberate crunching on nachos and sipping on beer in front of a grunting, whistling boob toob, but Mark’s red elongated head and large pleading pecan eyes won my heart. I replied, Sorry Josh, I can’t miss this race. I was only bummed from the plan change for a little while, until I hopped in my old white Dodge and saw my exercise license dangling from my rear view mirror. I smiled and sang along with the radio all the way to the track. For the first time ever, I did not have to pay for parking. I simply flashed my badge and chose a spot close to the grandstand entrance.
The giant ¾ moon captured my attention while I waited for Mark’s race. I declared a spot near the rail where the horses danced around as the awkward humans saddled the excited racers. Preceding my last month of self-marketing, I would have feared standing alone in such a public place. On previous visits to the track, I came with groups of friends, but now I’m standing better than I ever did. Glowing and smirking downward, the moon and mood of the night reminded me of an Oscar Wilde quote: “A dreamer is one who can only find his way by moonlight, and his punishment is that he sees the dawn before the rest of the world.” I am the dreamer, and I found my way on a moonlit path, but dawn is no longer a punishment. Dawn doesn’t leave me dreaming in my bed, waiting for my heart’s desires to find me. Tonight, I sauntered into this track with the flash of my real badge. Because of my true courage I am now a member of the exclusive community I thought only existed in my dreams. Now, dawn’s only punishment is the sweet real ache of muscles that prove I am no longer just dreaming.
My shiny red friend swaggered into the saddling paddock for the fifth race like he ruled the track. His only display of angst was in the way he walked. Mark stepped light and brief on his tiptoes, not flat-footed like usual. Mr. Tate tossed Juan into the saddle after some quick instructions. Juan spied me standing along the rail and winked as he proudly steered Mark toward the track. Ahhh, the track looked glorious in the illuminating lights. On a whim, I put five dollars on Mark to win, then took my place at the wire (finish line). My eyes bugged out and my hands clenched imaginary reins as the eleven horse field loaded into the gates.
Be calm boy. You practiced this gate thing on Saturday. Wait for it…wait….GO BOY!! I thought these things, but did not shout. I’m not really a shouter. That is, until they turned the final turn and Mark and Juan were out front! GO MARK! You can DO IT! YES! I clutched my ticket and did a little happy skipping dance because my best equine friend won! No one else had thought very highly of Mark, and his odds ended up at 30-1. When I cashed out my crumpled paper bet ticket, $155.00 later, the dreamy moon was still glowing, but I was the one who was smirking!

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