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I have been at a training barn for about a year and 3 months. I came to this barn because I was able to keep my horse in half training, where she was ridden 2 times a week and I was given a lesson 2x a week. The goal was to be able to show at a national level and win. I had, a month prior to coming, won national titles in showmanship, horsemanship, halter, and trail. At first, my trainer was on it, especially with the western riding. About 6 months in, I stopped getting lessons, even though I was still showing up 2-3 times a week. I have had to cancel 4 shows this year, as my horse had not been sound (even though he thought she would be sound by the time we showed). At the last show, I didn't place in any of my classes (showmanship, horsemanship, equitation, trail, and western riding). My trainer blamed me for this and said I was "changing the plan" and "difficult to work with" (which I have not been accused of before). After we got back from the show, I asked what I can do as the client to make his life easier as a trainer. I explained I didn't understand what he meant by difficult. He did not answer; instead he yelled at me and said he could not fix me and it was not his job. Furthermore, I have heard from others that he has badmouthed me and every other client he has. If it were just up to me, I would take my horse home and find another trainer. He has said (in the heat of the moment) that it might work better for me to only take lessons from him at shows and just leave the barn, or stop riding horses altogether. But my mom has her horse with him, and I don't know what we will do with her.

Any suggestions? What would you do?
 

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Whose paying this trainer, you or your mom?
 

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Then I would go elsewhere, pretty obvious you and the trainer don't mesh. Also the trainer is not helping you meet your goals at all. Go where you are learning things and helping you achieve your goals.
 

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I think you know the answer to your question already. Paying for professional services and not getting those services? Yes, examine your own behavior to see if you have a role in it, but if you are unhappy with your pro, go find someone you're happy with. As for your mom, she's a grown up and can make her own decisions.
 
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